Little gifts, left on my desk, like this one from Emerson, make me so happy.
I've been coming to the realization that the change I've gone through (that all of us Sabot pre-school people have been going through) is bigger than I thought. My friends Sara and Robyn are smart. They said even before school started that this year would be really hard, but I still didn't expect it. I usually love change and am always ready for the next step, whatever it is. I also tend to be unaware of myself a little bit. By the time I notice that I'm really sick, and go to the Doctor, he usually tells me that whatever I had is just about gone. Maybe that explains why I haven't given myself credit for going through something really, really big.
After all, I went from working at a little pre-school, where it seemed like I was building something special with a small group of friends who knew each other's ways, to being folded into a much bigger organization. I went from listening to and knowing the preferences of 12 teachers and trying to understand the intentions of 68 children, to trying to work with many more teachers, and students from 2 year olds through 8th graders. Most everything is different, from the leadership structure to the number of staff and families we work with.
I don't mean to complain. A lot of the changes are nice, and most people don't get to work at their dream job for so many years, in a community as inclusive as Sabot's. However, I do think I need to acknowledge to myself that starting this year meant starting a whole new job, and it has been very, very hard. Hopefully, it will get easier and more fun. Maybe it already has, and I just haven't realized it yet ( :
So, thanks Emerson, I needed that!
Oh, goodness, it hadn't occurred to me what the change meant for you in particular. Internet hugs for you, my friend!
ReplyDeleteI've been mourning some of the changes, too, from the parent/community side of things. There are a lot of fantastic things about being a preK-8 school, but also a lot of sacrifices, including losing some of the things that drew us to the school in the first place. Change is definitely hard.
This has been a year of growing pains.... for staff, families, and even the kids... all moving around in a new building, trying to find the "space" to be who each is going to be within it. The children have lost the open and ready access to the outdoors, the families (preschool) have lost the sense of community the old playground fostered, and the staff, well you explained that above. I do know that the children all have a sense of reverance and awe when they speak of the Studio, and of you. Your room holds magic! A place where they can go and make, and be, and create, and dream....all with your gentle, loving support. That hasn't changed for the children at least. Thank you for providing that constant in their lives, as they deal with the difficult changes they have been expected to make. I hope that Sabot has a little magic for you...something unexpected that may come from the change...
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